


Wasted Days, Sleepless Nights

by PrimalScream



Series: Unleash your heart and soul [9]
Category: Black Sails
Genre: Angst, Established Relationship, Explicit Sexual Content, M/M, Porn
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-07-29
Updated: 2016-07-29
Packaged: 2018-07-27 12:45:34
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,530
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7618585
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/PrimalScream/pseuds/PrimalScream
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Billy knows that things can’t go on the way they are. </p><p>Title from the song <a href="https://open.spotify.com/track/2PoIKrT2WSEvJlJjlO6eKY">Is This Love</a> by Whitesnake</p>
            </blockquote>





	Wasted Days, Sleepless Nights

Billy's spent the entire walk to the fort second guessing himself. He hasn't seen Vane in a week, not since the incident outside the tavern. He doesn’t know yet what he intends to say to Vane, but Billy knows that things can’t go on the way they are.

He knows he’s been the one avoiding it, but he doesn’t know if he can stand hearing Vane tell him that all that’s between them is fucking. It’s one thing for Billy to think it, it’s another to face it head on, but he thinks that at this point, he needs to hear it. He needs to know for certain.

He can’t continue this way. He can’t concentrate, almost fell out the rigging yesterday because his mind had been elsewhere. Silver has started asking questions and if Billy continues to evade him, he knows that Silver will find other means to get his answer.

As he navigates the passages he pulls up short when he sees Eleanor. She doesn't see him immediately. She's putting her hair back up. Billy's stomach flips over and his heart starts to beat faster. Before he can turn back she spots him.

“What are you doing here?”

Billy shrugs before saying, “Lost.”

Her eyebrows shoot up.“Lost? Inside the fort?”

Billy just shrugs again. He's really not interested in having this conversation. The last person he’d expected to find here was her and with the way his heart is jack hammering and the way his palms are starting to sweat he needs to get as far away as possible as soon as possible.

“Does Flint know you're here?”

He shrugs a third time and turns to go. He gets two steps before he’s stopped dead by Vane’s voice.

“I sent for him.”

Billy turns back around and Vane is watching him. He’s shirtless and shoeless and Billy’s breath hitches. He doesn’t have to think very hard to know what all of this means. He meets Vane’s eyes. The stare at each other for long seconds before the silence is broken.

“You sent for him?” Her voice is incredulous.

Vane blows out a breath and doesn't take his eyes from Billy as he answers, “Yes I sent for him. You should probably go, Eleanor.”

Billy sees her give Vane a look before she leaves.

Once she's gone Billy breaks eye contact and says, “I should go.”

“I didn't fuck her.”

Billy feels his mouth open and then close. He feels the tension in his shoulders lift. For the first time in the last ten minutes he doesn't feel like he's going to vomit. But the relief is short lived. Fucking or not, Vane had her here and he’s well aware of what that means for him.

“What?”

“I didn't fuck her.” Vane blows out a breath before continuing, “I haven't fucked anyone other than you since we started this.”

Billy doesn’t think he’s lying. He’s not even sure right at this second if he cares if he’s lying or not. The jealousy he’d felt last week and today drives him forward. A primal instinct takes over to claim what’s his.

Billy covers the space between them in five steps. He crowds Vane against the wall and takes his mouth in a possessive kiss. It's wet and hot as their breath mingles together.

He grabs Vane under the ass and lifts him. Billy puts Vane’s back against the wall. Vane's legs immediately go around Billy's waist.

“Jesus, that does it for you? Knowing I'm so tied up in knots over you that I can't even get hard for anyone else?”

Billy moans into Vane's neck. God, he'd never been jealous before, not of anyone, not of anything, but the thought of someone else touching Vane had driven him mad and now this is the second time and he can’t keep doing this.

When he’d seen Eleanor in the hallway he’d wanted to remove her bodily from the building.

Billy pushes his hips hard against Vane's. His cock is so hard already. He sucks kisses down the length of Vane's throat as he grinds against Vane's cock.

Vane's head goes back against the wall. Billy squeezes Vane's ass and pulls him tighter against his body.

Vane's fingers are scratching over Billy's scalp and his back is sliding up the wall with every thrust of Billy's hip. Billy is sucking marks all over Vane’s neck and chest. Vane gently pushes Billy’s head back.

His eyes bore into Billy’s. They travel his whole face and once again come back to stare into his eyes. Billy doesn't know what he’s searching for. Billy’s not even sure what’s showing on his face. Vane kisses him chastely.

“In there.” He motions to the room.

Vane starts to loosen his legs around Billy’s waist and Billy decides he’s not having that. He carries Vane into the room and shuts the door with his foot. He place Vane on the bed and follows him down keeping their bodies connected.

He seals their mouths together as he rocks his body against Vane’s. Their cocks rub together and they both moan. Billy’s so hard he’s dizzy. Vane’s hands grab his ass as he grinds up and Billy’s stuck by how much he wants Vane to fuck him. They’ve never, Billy’s never, but he wants it.

“I want you fuck me.” Billy says it directly against Vane’s ear afraid of what his face may hold.

Vane goes still. “What?”

“I want you to fuck me.”

“Have you ever?”

“No.”

Vane’s head drops back to the bed, his eyes close as he draws a slow breath.

“If you don’t…”

“I do.”

Vane rolls them so that he’s straddling Billy. He traces Billy’s face with his fingers. They stroke across Billy’s cheekbone before ghosting along the top of his ear. Billy turns his head into the touch. There’s a look on Vane’s face that he refuses to read or acknowledge.

Vane scoots down to sit on Billy’s thighs. He pulls Billy into a sitting position so he can get to Billy’s shirt. He whips it over Billy’s head across the room. Vane pushes him back and follows him down into a kiss. His hair creates a curtain of warmth around them and Billy gets lost in the feel of Vane’s tongue against his.

He bites Billy’s lower lip gently, pulling it into his mouth and sucking before tracing his tongue along the ridge of Billy’s teeth. Billy can’t help the soft moan as Vane’s tongue tickles the roof of his mouth.

Billy shivers when Vane trails his fingers down Billy’s chest. His thumbs brush gently against Billy’s nipples. He moans as Vane pulls and rolls them between his fingers. Vane trails a line of sucking kisses down Billy’s neck. Billy arches into him sighing.

For all that Billy thought he knew about what he wanted, what he needed, he didn’t realize how much he craved the reverence in the way Vane touches him. He didn’t realize he wanted touch like this.

Vane divests them of their pants before sliding back over Billy’s body. He hisses when they come together, skin against skin.

Vane works his way down Billy’s body, nipping and licking across Billy’s chest and abdomen. He bypasses Billy’s cock and instead licks down his hipbones, tongue tracing a pattern in the light hair, before he laves the base of Billy’s cock.

Billy’s hips push up, body begging. Vane throws his arm across Billy’s hips and when Billy looks down Vane is smiling at him, eye’s challenging.

He lets his head fall back, hips lowering as well. Vane licks up the side of Billy’s cock, the flat of his tongue sliding slickly over the head and then down the other side. Seconds later Vane is swallowing him and Billy shouts, voice ragged.

Vane doesn’t waste any time. His head bobs fast, cheeks sucked in, tongue pressing hard on the vein on the underside. He take a few deep breaths and goes all the way down. Billy feels himself sliding into the back of Vane’s throat and then Vane swallows around him.

“Oh, fuck.” Billy’s hands go to Vane’s head. Fingers threading through the hair at the nape of Vane’s neck.

Vane comes up, sucking in gulps of air before going back down again. Billy pulls at Vane’s head, pulls him up so he can thrust shallowly. Small trails of spit connect Vane’s mouth to his cock when Vane pulls all the way off.

He licks over the head pulling the foreskin all the way back. He runs his tongue in circles over the slit, probes gently before sliding under the ridge. Billy can’t look away as Vane takes one of his fingers into his mouth beside Billy’s cock.

After it's wet he reaches down and brushes gently over Billy’s hole. Billy’s body tenses but then relaxes as pleasure hits him. He shivers, hips pressing against Vane’s finger as it circles him.

Vane reaches to the bedside to grab the pot of oil. He slicks his middle finger and goes back to Billy’s ass. His finger circles slowly. Billy can feel himself clenching and releasing.

He takes Billy’s cock back into his mouth as his finger pushes in. Billy’s ready for the sting, the slight discomfort. Vane doesn’t stop, keeps pushing until he’s in all the way. He lets Billy’s cock fall from his mouth.

Billy can feel himself being watched, knows Vane is looking for signs that Billy wants to stop, but stopping is the last thing on his mind. If this is all they’ll ever have he wants every part of Vane that he’s willing to give.

He pushes back silently asking for more. Vane slides his finger in and out a dozen times before he brushes upward and Billy sees stars. He whimpers softly when Vane pulls out.

Vane comes back with two fingers, slicker, harder and again pushes all the way in without stopping. Billy feels his brows draw together at the burn of it. Vane licks around his cock again, sucking the head tight as he starts to move his fingers.

It only takes seconds for Billy to get used to it enough that he’s pushing back again, trying to get Vane to touch that spot inside him. He feels Vane’s mouth tracing down his thighs, his breath blowing against the short hairs there making goosebumps pop out over Billy’s body.

Vane comes up, mouth seeking and Billy meets him halfway. The kiss is soft and just a brush of lips at first. But then Vane switches angles and Billy’s hips press down and his mouth falls open. His tongue sweeps inside meeting Billy’s as his fingers start to press harder and faster.

Vane’s fingers work, twisting and pulling, catching Billy’s rim making him gasp and buck against Vane and before long Billy is clinging to him, body twitching while he begs.

Vane is back to running his tongue all over Billy’s cock. His fingers are stroking into him stretching him wide and then pressing up and rubbing and Billy needs him inside so badly. He thrusts his hips down seeking more of Vane.

It seems like hours to Billy when Vane finally pulls his fingers free. He puts Billy on his stomach and Billy’s starts to protest.

“It’ll be easier for you this way.”

Billy knows it’s true, but he’d wanted to watch Vane’s face, but Vane isn’t taking no for an answer. He puts Billy on his hands and knees. He starts to push in, gets the head and an inch or two inside and then Billy’s body locks up tight.

Vane can’t get any further in and pulling out would cause Billy pain. Keeping them connected, he slowly lowers Billy’s body to the bed. Vane is pressed to his back as he pushes Billy’s left leg up to open Billy’s body. He circles his hips and Billy loosens enough for Vane to get a few more inches inside.

Vane is still, not pulling out, not pushing in, and Billy is frustrated that his body won’t cooperate. He feels Vane sit up slightly and then feels more oil where they’re joined before he comes to rest along Billy’s back again. Vane pulls them both to their sides gently.

He kisses along Billy’s shoulders as his hand runs down the front of Billy’s body. Vane presses his nose to the back of Billy’s neck. He pulls Billy’s left leg back over his hip.

Vane’s arm comes across him to stroke down his stomach in slow waves. Fingers gently pressing between Billy’s ribs, tracing the muscles in Billy’s stomach. Billy’s stomach flutters under his hand and pleasure rolls through him but his body still won’t open up. Billy makes a frustrated noise.

“It’s okay, I’ve got you. Stop thinking about it.”

Vane kisses everywhere he can reach and where he can’t reach he touches with his fingers. Billy has never been petted, he’s never been worshipped the way Vane is doing now. Everywhere he touches leaves a trail of fire that makes him harder.

Vane touches him everywhere but his cock and Billy is so hard he aches. Vane’s hips are circling gently and Billy can feel him, thick and hard filling him.

He’s whispering into Billy’s skin, words and phrases Billy doesn’t understand.

 _Estoy loco por ti,_ as he licks along the vein in Billy’s bicep.

 _No quiero a nadie salvo ti,_ as he pulls Billy’s earlobe into his mouth with a sharp bite.

It’s not the words, Billy doesn't know them, it’s the tone and the cadence that have Billy tilting sideways.

 _Mi vida, mi corazón, mi alma son tuyos_ as Vane presses a bite to the back of his neck.

And when Vane says his name in that same tone Billy’s body unlocks. Everything that Billy hadn’t been conscious of holding back releases inside him. Vane slides the rest of the way in without further resistance and they both moan as Vane’s hips come to rest flush against his ass.

Billy feels the tension bleed from him, he feels himself opening as the last pieces fall into place. He’s in love with Vane and Billy knows there is no going back. He can’t pretend any longer that he can save himself.

He can’t pretend that he can walk away whole or that if he doesn’t acknowledge it, he won’t feel it. He knows that when this is over today, he’s going to leave and he won’t be coming back. But he needs this, he wants it, and he will have it.

Vane rolls them back over so that Billy is on his stomach. He feels Vane’s hands searching through the bedclothes. He finds both of Billy’s hands and he twines all of their fingers together.

Billy can feel himself flowering open under Vane, can feel the way his body is pulsing with need. He can feel Vane kissing across his shoulders, up the back of his neck and it just makes Billy relax even further.

“You feel so good.” Vane whispers against his back as his hips start to thrust slowly. Vane pushes Billy's left leg further up the bed with his own as he settles more fully on his knees between Billy’s thighs. He feels Vane’s thighs rubbing against his own.

Billy pushes back with his hips to meet Vane’s trust. They’re in sync, bodies coming together and parting in a perfect rhythm that has Billy seeing stars. It’s slow and Vane is so deep Billy can feel him everywhere and he feels so good. He shivers when Vane slides just right.

“That it?” Vane asks hitting that same spot again.

Billy can only nod, he's so lost to the feeling of Vane surrounding him. Vane concentrates on stroking over that same place again and again until Billy is undulating under him, hips pressing down into the bed to get friction on his cock. He stretches his body out further, arms reaching above his head as his fucks his hips back against Vane.

Vane shifts back forcing Billy to follow.

“Yeah, that’s it, come on, take what you want.”

Billy presses back and back and back until he’s built a rhythm and he’s fucking himself on Vane’s cock as Vane guides him, hands loose on his hips.

Vane leans over him and grips Billy’s cock giving him a slick channel to slide through. He’s fucking back and forth frantically but it’s not enough.

“Please.” He pleads.

Vane is right there fucking into him hard, holding him tight by the hips as his cock sinks deeper with each thrust. Billy’s on his hands and knees, head hanging between his arms, gasping out breaths. He goes down to his elbows pushes his ass up and back. Vane grinds in, his cock so deep that Billy loses his breath.

He feels the name slip past his lips and he can only pray that Vane didn’t hear it. He’d never intended to use his given name, hadn’t so far but right now, with Vane in him so deep Billy swears he can feel him in his lungs, it had slipped, a single word, Charles.

Any hope he’d had that Vane hadn’t heard him is dashed when he demands Billy say it again. And Billy does, over and over as Vane fucks him slow and deep. He pulls all the way out and then pushes back in inch by inch and Billy is crying out to him for more and harder.

Vane puts them back on their sides. He thrusts shallowly with Billy’s leg over his hip and his lips on Billy’s throat. He reaches over and takes Billy’s cock in hand. He strokes in time with his hips and it only takes Billy a few minutes to be on the edge. He’s so strung out and his nerves are frayed and he wants to come but Vane let’s go of his cock.

He runs his hands across Billy’s stomach, up over his chest. He trails his fingertips along Billy’s thigh as he places soft kisses all along Billy’s shoulder. Vane slows his hips to a grind as he takes Billy’s cock in his hand once more.

Long loose pulls make Billy leak over Vane’s fingers slicking the way. Billy’s hips start to hitch, forward into Vane’s fist and then back onto his cock. Billy’s becoming mindless, chasing pleasure, only one goal in mind.

Vane starts a counter rhythm, cock sliding over that sweet spot with every thrust. He feels Vane’s teeth in his shoulder, can hear him groaning, saying Billy’s name as his hips start to move faster.

Billy is desperate, he brings his hand over Vane’s tightens it around him as they stroke him together. He licks up Billy’s neck, bites his earlobe and tells Billy to come.

Billy can’t do anything but obey. His head goes back against Vane’s shoulder, his name sliding off Billy’s tongue as he comes over Vane’s fist. Billy is shuddering, body going tight and then boneless, breath stopping for long minutes as his vision whites out.

He’s still moaning softly when Vane pushes deep and comes. Billy feels him pulsing inside, he tries to memorize how he feels right now, he wants to be able to close his eyes in the dark of night and remember exactly this.

He want to remember the way Vane whispers his name and the way his lips brush against Billy’s shoulder. He wants to remember the feeling of Vane around him, of his arm over Billy’s stomach clutching him close.

He lets himself breathe for long minutes as they both come down. His breath catches as Vane slides out of him. He’s up and moving to the wash basin, pouring water over a cloth.

He cleans them both, watches Vane watch him, his eyes hazy and satisfied, face soft. His fingers run along Billy’s thighs, his arms, touching wherever he can reach until Billy slides away.

He doesn’t get back in bed. Instead he’s collecting his clothes when Vane reaches for him. Billy gets his pants and boots on just out of reach.

“Stay.”

“I can’t. I...I told Silver I’d help him...I have to go.”

Vane grabs for him, gets ahold of his arm and forces Billy to face him. Vane puts a hand to his cheek, brings their mouths together softly before pressing his cheek against Billy’s

Vane’s voice is soft, pleading. “Please, stay. Billy, please.”

Billy pulls away and bangs out the door without another word leaving Vane staring after him.

Billy’s half way down the corridor when he hears the first crash, knows without a doubt it's the porcelain wash basin. He hears Vane curse before another crash, this time what sounds like that table the basin had been sitting on.

Billy hurries through the halls of the fort back to the ship. Everything in him is screaming for him to go back, but Billy can’t, he can’t have this, it’s not his.

Billy knows Vane cares for him, but not enough. Not the way Billy needs, not the way Billy wants and Billy has to end this before he loses what little bit of himself he has left.

**Author's Note:**

> * Estoy loco por ti - crazy for you  
> * No quiero a nadie salvo ti - I want no one but you  
> *Mi vida, mi corazon, mi alma son tuyos. - my life, my heart, my soul, are yours
> 
> Translations via @hansbmd Thanks to @buckysjustslower for hooking me up with someone who could translate for me. MUCH APPRECIATED!!!


End file.
